Dr Farquar's Case History

August 17, 2004

Dr Farquar on Laughter

Laughter

Why do some people have irritating laughs? (Contributed by T.C.)

Dr F. Have you tried another bank to ask for money?

Didn’t the guy who laughs last had to have had it explained to him? (Contributed by Bill D.)

Dr F. I know. It’s a joke isn’t it?

Why do many people say they can’t communicate in other languages? Doesn’t everybody laugh in the same language? (Contributed by FunTrivia)

Dr F. True. Foreigners who giggle during sex can be very irritating and will probably embarrass your wife.

When blondes have more fun, do they know it? (Contributed by B.N. Lightning)

Dr F. No, but ignorance is bliss anyway. Try this simple test. On the other hand, don’t bother.

Aren’t most people just as happy as they decide to be? (Contributed by Terry Galan)

Dr F. They are not as convinced as miserable bastards.

Isn’t a truly happy person one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour? (Contributed by Nancy)

Dr F. It depends if you have already told them to get lost.

Did you ever think that maybe humour isn’t for everyone? Could it be only for people who want to have fun, enjoy life, and feel alive? (Contributed by Anne Wilson Schaef)

Dr F. Yes, different sexual positions can be hilarious.

Doesn’t a good feeling get even better when it is shared? (Contributed by neeru)

Dr F. Not, if it’s a fart.

How come everything is more fun when you say, ‘Wheeeeee!’? (Contributed by The Duke of Endor)

Dr F. That too.

Since nobody really cares if we are miserable, we might as well be happy, right? (Contributed by Cynthia)

Dr F. You could be right. But what if you are never more happy moaning.

Why are fat people jolly and skinny people bad tempered?

Dr F. Comfort eating is a way to feel happy. If thin people can’t be bothered to do that too, then no wonder they are sad. Kate Moss is scrawny and miserable. She doesn’t eat and prefers to use a little crack for her own pleasure.

If you laugh inappropriately with other people who do the same , then who can tell the difference, or even gives a shit?

Dr F. Maybe sharing homemade hashish cake at the local ante natal clinic is not the way to proceed.

Why can’t women have more fun on their cycle?

Dr F. Depends on the terrain.

Why do we laugh at others mishaps, but hate to be humiliated ourselves?

Dr F. Slapstick is instinctive fun. Look at all the many weird faces you pull when you are doing it?

Why is the most famous smile in the artworld that of a Mona?

Dr F. The Laughing Cavalier probably just gave her one.

Why did my mother want me to be happy but kept telling me to “wipe that smile off my face.”

Dr F. Wait until she has a stroke and she will be ‘laughing on the other side of her face’.

Why do some comedians leave you hysterical?

Dr F. How long were you married?

Why do people think that winning the lottery will be the one thing that will make them happy?

Dr F. I would too, if I had six balls and got fucked twice a week.

Alcohol is called ‘chemical happiness’ but causes grief, and will kill you. How come?

Dr F. Try drinking varnish. You will die much quicker but it will be your chance to shine and help you wind up with a beautiful finish.

As a nun, marrying into the church and being washed clean of my sins make me laugh with joy every day.

Dr F. Cleanliness is next to godliness. You have ‘hope in your soul’, but I expect, when you are in the baththough, its the other way around.

How do you know if somebody is laughing ‘with you’ and not ‘at you’.

Dr F. Hit them in the mouth with a meataxe sideways and nobody will notice either way.

Why was Batman not impressed with The Joker’s sense of humour?

Dr F. He should have met the joker who fitted my kitchen. Him and Robin would piss themselves.

Don’t children bring you more laughter than any drug?

Dr F. Try LSD and the contraceptive pill and have a nice trip without the kids.

Why is sex so much fun without laughing?

Dr F. Laughter is always spontaneous or on the sperm of the moment.

Isn’t it strange that a newborn cries as a Mother smiles?

Dr F. Being stuck in sludge for nine months and then wrestled outside by a stranger, stark bollock naked , have them stick your fingers down your throat, and hang you upside down with a great whack on the arse, is your idea of fun?

http://DrFarquar.wordpress.com
http://FugitiveAuthor.com
http://DailyReckless.co.uk

Advertisements

Leave a Comment »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Blog at WordPress.com.

%d bloggers like this: